It's nothing to do with the corruption of Arab regimes. Nothing to do with a pandemic of xenophobic and violent Islamic fundamentalism. Nothing to do with the starry-eyed incompetence of the few ostensibly democratic activisits when it comes to out-organizing the thugs who want to run their nations into the ground, sharia-style.

Nothing to do with the fact that these countries have never known a genuinely free and democratic civil society, since long before any Western diplomat, soldier or NGO rep ever had the power or inclination to muck about in this part of the world. Nothing to do with the utter contempt the one half of the population of this region that can grow a beard has for the other half that can't.

They may already be dead.

According to HRANA and JOOPEA, these four men will be hanged for sodomy according to Shari’a law.

A gay activist based in Iran said: ‘Although being gay is not a crime based on Iranian criminal law but this is the most clear statement against same sex-acts in past months.’

He added that ‘there were our other men hanged in past five months.’

Newly-empowered Islamist lawmakers in Egypt understand the pressing needs of their nation.

Tourism has fallen off a cliff. The economy is in the toilet. Copts are under siege. The Sinai desert has turned into a lawless frontier filled with arms smugglers and terrorists.

Clearly, what all men need in these troubled times is a stress-relieving roll in the hay with their recently-deceased wives.

DOCTOR. I'm sorry, sir. Your wife has passed. Would you like a moment?

BEREAVED MAN. Yes. Please. Lock the door on your way out. Oh, one last thing. Have you got a condom?

So much respect that the Syrian army is shooting right at them.

Sudanese Writer Al Haj Waraq explains why Egypt is in grave danger thanks to the rise of the Islamists, who are perfectly happy to take power democratically and then remove that option for other parties.

The United Nations Security Council has voted to send 300 observers to Syria to observe the non-ceasefire between jihadist-dominated rebels and a relatively secular totalitarian dictatorship.

"We've got deck chairs, coolers filled with ice-cold beer and all the bags of popcorn and Doritos we could carry," says one designated UN observer. "This is going to be awesome, like watching one of those really gritty war-movies in real-life. It's a shame people have to keep dying, but neither side is backing down and it's not like anything we do will make the slightest bit of difference. Some of us might as well be entertained, right?"

TURKEY. "Look here, jackass. If you are going to keep shooting at people on my side of the border, I might just decide to invoke Article 5."

SYRIA. "Article 5? What's that? Another useless United Nations resolution? Why are you wasting my time with this crap?"

TURKEY. "No. Article 5 of the NATO treaty declares that an armed attack against one of its members will be considered an attack against all members. In other words, when I decide to send in my troops to reinstate an Ottoman protectorate over all of your territory, I'm going to have NATO backing me up. Didn't work out too well for Gadhaffi, did it?

SYRIA. "Fine. I will tell my soldiers to be more careful and only shoot indiscriminately at civilians on my side of the border. Are we cool?"

TURKEY. "Yeah, we're cool."

SYRIA. "Good. Thanks to this unscheduled meeting, I'm already behind on my fingernail quota for the day. Seriously, could you ping me in advance on Google Calendar or something? My whole morning is off."

TURKEY. "Don't push it."

SYRIA. "Yeah, whatever. Hey, there's a family of five sneaking up to your lines. Still time to take care of this. Sorry, buddy. Got to go."

Jonathon Narvey is the Editor of The Propagandist

The Syrian regime has spent the past week or so showing its good faith towards implementation of a "peace plan" by indiscriminately shelling people in a city it has effectively declared the base of the resistance. Over 9,000 people have been killed thus far, with no end in sight.

Meanwhile, the Free Syrian Army has a bone to pick with the way the regime wants to set the terms of the deal with the United Nations:

“When the regime asks Kofi Annan for written guarantees that we will drop our weapons it is actually mocking the United Nations. This is a joke.”

It sounds to me like a genuine peace deal is imminent.

Nadia Khoury is a Contributing Writer for The Propagandist

We've known this for a while, but a new example of persecution of minorities by the resurgent Islamist powers-that-be pretty much puts the nail in this coffin -- interestingly, in another case of blasphemy by cartoon.

So, the details. A 17-year old Coptic Christian posts cartoons deemed to be mocking the Muslim prophet Mohammed. In reaction, Muslims with the endemic faulty impulse control we've seen many times before decide that the most reasonable, rational response is to indiscriminately attack Christians and burn down their homes.

No word on whether the thugs or arsonists received any punishment whatsoever. But as for the youth who posted the cartoons in the first place -- well, he can look forward to three years in prison.

Three years in prison for "insulting Islam" and "the Prophet", the court ordered.

Sharia doesn't just guide the Egyptian constitution. It is the Egyptian constitution.

Jonathon Narvey is the Editor of The Propagandist

The Iranian regime has outlawed singing and dancing for kindergardten students, as such "immoral" acts are not in line with Islam. Well, it's about time. If the entire adult population is forbidden to have any happiness in their lives on pain of jail, torture or death, why should young children get a break? Uniform, unrelenting misery really ought to be ground into the kids at a young age if they're going to grow up to be good theocratic fascists.